I've been meaning to write this post for awhile, but never got around to it. A couple months ago I heard a really great sermon at my church and it kind of correlated with a lot of things God has been teaching me over the past several years.
The sermon was about the glory of God and the pastor started out with a quote by A.W. Tozer: "the mightiest thought the mind can entertain is that of God." Then he mentioned how people have tried to understand God and tried to figure out which characteristic of God are the most important. Does God's love trump everything else? or his grace? or his holiness? What about his justice and wrath- how does that fit in? In an effort to understand God, we may end up putting him in a box. When we try to make God into who we want him to be, we make him an idol- and we are truly worshipping ourselves!
What it all comes down to is this: We can't try to make God who we want Him to be... We must get to know who He is!
I didn't understand this for a long time. I think I was always trying to make God fit into my idea of God. I didn't accept reformed theology for a long time because it didn't fit in with what I knew of God. But the more Bible verses I read and the more I get to know who God really is, I find that my ideas about him were so wrong! We can't comprehend him. We can't ever fully understand all the aspects of his nature. But we can know Him. We can learn a little bit more about Him each day. God wants to reveal himself to us, if only we will let him!
The pastor talked about how the weight of God's presence changes everything. Now that is God as a reality, not just a concept! When God enters your life, it should be like a cannonball- he displaces everything else out. God may have to ruin us so he can build us into something better. It may be hard to see what's going on during the ruining, but God's plans are so much greater than what we could imagine. We can't always see his purpose, but we can always draw closer to Him. As we get to know Him better, we may realize we had so many misperceptions- and that the actual God is so much more amazing than the one we created!
Friday, September 30, 2011
Saturday, September 24, 2011
The Comparing Game
It's ridiculous what you can convince yourself of when you're playing the comparing game. When I want to feel like a good student, I compare myself to the partyers and slackers in my class. I tell myself that I work so much harder then them. I'm more organized, more wise with my time, smarter, better (Pride!). But when I see other students in my class studying more, getting better grades, and being more dedicated, I feel like a failure in comparison. I say that "at least I still go out and have fun- I don't study ALL the time" to make me feel better about not measuring up. So in one scenario, I paint myself to be the perfect student, and in the other I don't measure up.
When we try to have the "best of both worlds", we're really missing out. We can't try to fit in with other people's standards and still follow God. When we compare ourselves to other people, it's pointless, because God hasn't asked us to be better than other people. He's called us to follow Him. He's called us to be like HIM! It shouldn't matter what anyone else is or isn't doing. If everyone around us is falling into sin, still we should follow God. If everyone around us is leading a fruitful life and doing great things, still we should follow God. We should do what he's called us to do, regardless of what everyone else is doing. Following God's will is not a place of pride, but of peace and true happiness!
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
My life lately
I feel like the one constant thing in my life is studying. Other things change. I get into phases where I work out a lot, or read a lot, or there are times when I'm really good at having a daily quiet time (I really need to work on that one!). But I always have studying to do. And the thing about PT school is that I actually have to remember this stuff. Not just for the test. For the real world- because someday I'm going to be in a hospital or clinic treating patients and I need to know what to do! The problem is that it's so hard to put all this stuff together. I need to take anatomy, neuro, rehab, kinesiology, orthopedics... and combine all the concepts together to be able to diagnose, evaluate, and treat patients. I feel like I'll never be able to remember enough of it to be a good therapist.
I often feel like I'm not doing enough. I feel like I should look up articles on my own, review anatomy and M&A, go to clinics with professors, etc. But honestly, it's all I can do just to keep up with all my classes. I study a lot, so in my spare time, I don't want to do anything PT- related. I need the mental break from schoolwork. That's why I love going to church and Bible study so much. It's a nice change of pace from the PT world. That's also one of the reasons why I love to run now. It's refreshing to be able to go outside and do something after sitting inside in class for most of the day.
In other news, we had the PT department picnic this weekend, which was pretty fun. The second year class is responsible for providing the main dish, so we brought hot dogs, hamburgers, and chicken and had a great cookout! It was fun to hang out with some of the first and third year students (and some of the professors!)
I often feel like I'm not doing enough. I feel like I should look up articles on my own, review anatomy and M&A, go to clinics with professors, etc. But honestly, it's all I can do just to keep up with all my classes. I study a lot, so in my spare time, I don't want to do anything PT- related. I need the mental break from schoolwork. That's why I love going to church and Bible study so much. It's a nice change of pace from the PT world. That's also one of the reasons why I love to run now. It's refreshing to be able to go outside and do something after sitting inside in class for most of the day.
In other news, we had the PT department picnic this weekend, which was pretty fun. The second year class is responsible for providing the main dish, so we brought hot dogs, hamburgers, and chicken and had a great cookout! It was fun to hang out with some of the first and third year students (and some of the professors!)
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| Brad, Austin, Dr. Bowman, Marie, and me |
Monday, September 19, 2011
Forever Pace
Time for a running update!
I've been really excited and motivated with my half-marathon training. I hope the motivation continues even when I get stressed out with school. Yesterday I ran 6 miles with Tristan and it felt great! We ran just a little over a 9-minute per mile pace. It was the first time -ever- that I'd run 6 miles continuously! Each new distance from here on out will be uncharted territory. I'm excited to get up to higher mileage, but I'm sticking to my training schedule and trying not to advance too quickly. I know that my body needs some time to adjust to the demands I'm making on it. Slow and steady- that's my goal for training and for the race!
Even though I'm enthusiastic about running now, sometimes I still don't want to go out and run. A few days ago, I was supposed to run 3 miles, but I really didn't want to. It was one of those lazy days where I just didn't feel like doing anything active. I was curled up on the couch watching TV and I really wanted to stay there. Yet I still dragged myself outside and struggled through those 3 miles. It was horrible. I got stomach cramps and just couldn't seem to find the right pace. It didn't make sense to me- just two days before I had run 5 miles and felt fine the entire time! But that happens, I think. You have good days and bad days. It takes a lot more spirit to keep fighting on the bad days. I'm more proud of myself for making it through the 3 tough miles that day than for the 5 easy miles.
Speaking of which, I actually like longer distances better now! It's weird- I always thought 3 miles was so far! But once you get up to 5 and 6 miles, 3 is almost a sprint. When I'm only running three, I feel like I have to run faster, and then I don't get into a good rhythm. When I run longer distances, I sometimes fall into an amazing pace where I feel like I can run forever! I get that runner's high- pure adrenaline- and it's just one foot after the other, mile after mile. I call it my "forever pace" and I LOVE it when I can hit that stride. It's one of the best feelings in the world.
I've been really excited and motivated with my half-marathon training. I hope the motivation continues even when I get stressed out with school. Yesterday I ran 6 miles with Tristan and it felt great! We ran just a little over a 9-minute per mile pace. It was the first time -ever- that I'd run 6 miles continuously! Each new distance from here on out will be uncharted territory. I'm excited to get up to higher mileage, but I'm sticking to my training schedule and trying not to advance too quickly. I know that my body needs some time to adjust to the demands I'm making on it. Slow and steady- that's my goal for training and for the race!
Even though I'm enthusiastic about running now, sometimes I still don't want to go out and run. A few days ago, I was supposed to run 3 miles, but I really didn't want to. It was one of those lazy days where I just didn't feel like doing anything active. I was curled up on the couch watching TV and I really wanted to stay there. Yet I still dragged myself outside and struggled through those 3 miles. It was horrible. I got stomach cramps and just couldn't seem to find the right pace. It didn't make sense to me- just two days before I had run 5 miles and felt fine the entire time! But that happens, I think. You have good days and bad days. It takes a lot more spirit to keep fighting on the bad days. I'm more proud of myself for making it through the 3 tough miles that day than for the 5 easy miles.
Speaking of which, I actually like longer distances better now! It's weird- I always thought 3 miles was so far! But once you get up to 5 and 6 miles, 3 is almost a sprint. When I'm only running three, I feel like I have to run faster, and then I don't get into a good rhythm. When I run longer distances, I sometimes fall into an amazing pace where I feel like I can run forever! I get that runner's high- pure adrenaline- and it's just one foot after the other, mile after mile. I call it my "forever pace" and I LOVE it when I can hit that stride. It's one of the best feelings in the world.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Being a quiet person
I love this blog by Pasta Queen about being a quiet person:
In Defense of Quiet People
This is exactly how I feel! The hard part about being in PT school with the same 55 people all the time, is that I know every single one of the other 54 people... and I have to be around them ALL the time! I ride the bus every day with people from my program. I have 8 hours of class a day with them. I eat lunch with them and hang out with them on the weekends. Sometimes it's too much. It's not that I don't want to talk to them and listen to them talk. But sometimes I just need a moment to myself. Sometimes I like to just sit quietly and not talk to anyone. I'm not trying to be mean. I'm just a quiet person!
In Defense of Quiet People
This is exactly how I feel! The hard part about being in PT school with the same 55 people all the time, is that I know every single one of the other 54 people... and I have to be around them ALL the time! I ride the bus every day with people from my program. I have 8 hours of class a day with them. I eat lunch with them and hang out with them on the weekends. Sometimes it's too much. It's not that I don't want to talk to them and listen to them talk. But sometimes I just need a moment to myself. Sometimes I like to just sit quietly and not talk to anyone. I'm not trying to be mean. I'm just a quiet person!
Friday, September 9, 2011
Coffee makes the world go round
Despite the coffee, I'm still super tired after a long day of classes. I don't understand why thinking takes so much more energy than physical activity. This summer I was way more physically active than I am right now, and I had TONS of energy! Somehow sitting in class all day is ten times more exhausting than hiking, biking, swimming, you name it. At least I have my running schedule to help me stay in shape now. And coffee to get me through the day.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Long days
Thursdays are my long days this semester. I'm in class from 8am-5pm. The good part is I had two labs today that I really enjoyed. The first was my Lifespan lab. We got to observe babies today- a newborn (17 days old), a 2.5 month old, and a 5.5 month old. One of the babies was the child of my clinical instructor. It was great to see her and her baby again! My CI also brought her 4 year old daughter and 2 year old son with her. They were so adorable! I really love little kids.
The other lab that turned out to be fun was my biomechanics lab. We had to do a worksheet with all kinds of physics problems. I forgot how much I love math! I know that sounds weird, but there's something particularly satisfying about working through math problems. I'm not especially good at math, but I just start with what I know and go step-by-step until I can solve for what I don't know. I like thinking logically and playing with numbers until I get the right solution. I like using trial-and-error until I find a way that works. One thing I really like is that there are multiple ways to get the right answer. It's not just memorization. It's using your brain to find the best solution. In other classes I tend to get bored after awhile, but I worked on problems for 2 hours in biomechanics lab, and the time seemed to fly by!
I'm glad I like these two classes, because I think Orthopedics will be the death of me.
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| Remember force vectors? |
The other lab that turned out to be fun was my biomechanics lab. We had to do a worksheet with all kinds of physics problems. I forgot how much I love math! I know that sounds weird, but there's something particularly satisfying about working through math problems. I'm not especially good at math, but I just start with what I know and go step-by-step until I can solve for what I don't know. I like thinking logically and playing with numbers until I get the right solution. I like using trial-and-error until I find a way that works. One thing I really like is that there are multiple ways to get the right answer. It's not just memorization. It's using your brain to find the best solution. In other classes I tend to get bored after awhile, but I worked on problems for 2 hours in biomechanics lab, and the time seemed to fly by!
I'm glad I like these two classes, because I think Orthopedics will be the death of me.
Monday, September 5, 2011
I'm gonna run
Happy Labor Day! This has been a crazy week for me, and at first I had no plans at all! I was all set for a slow weekend getting homework done. But I wasn't about to let my labor day weekend be boring. So Alicia and I got some pool time in after class on Friday, and then Kelly and I decided to go see X-Men First Class on Friday night. It was a really good movie- funny and suspenseful and much better than I expected! Kelly and I are going to catch up on the other X-Men movies now.
Friday evening I was texting back and forth with Emily, Tristan, and Robin. Emily and Tristan were on their way to Virginia Beach and wanted me to come with them. Robin had been in Virginia visiting family and was flying out of Richmond on Saturday. I hadn't seen Robin in about two years, since she moved to Texas. I really wanted to see her before she flew back to Texas. We met for breakfast at a pancake place by the airport on Saturday morning and got to catch up on each other's lives. It was awesome to see her again. I love how we can reconnect even when we haven't been in touch for awhile.
When I drove home after breakfast, it was about noon and I figured I still had plenty of time to drive to Virginia Beach and hang out with Tristan and Emily. Tristan was running the half marathon on Sunday, and I really wanted to be there to support her for her race. It was spontaneous, but I decided to go, packed my travel suitcase in about 10 minutes, and was on the road! That night Tristan had to carb-load for her big race, so we all went to Cheesecake Factory and got huge bowls of pasta. And cheesecake, of course. It was delicious!
On Sunday, we had to get up at 6am to get to the start line by 7am. Race day was exciting. There were thousands of people milling about, tons of port-a-pottys and food stands, and music was blaring from a loudspeaker. You could feel the excitement and nervousness in the air. It was awesome. At 7am, the elite runners took off. Twenty-three minutes later, Tristan started with her heat. It was cool to see so many people run by!
It was around this time that I decided I really want to do this. I have been toying with the idea of doing a half marathon for awhile. Several girls from my class are doing the Richmond marathon/half-marathon and they keep encouraging me to do it. I've been running consistently this summer and I've built up to about 4-5 miles so far. After being there with Tristan, and seeing the excitement and determination of everyone, I want to do it even more. I don't think 13.1 miles will be easy. But that's kind of the point. I want to be able to push through even if I'm hurting. I want to be able to run farther than I think I can. I want to have the determination and the strength to not give up. I want to experience the excitement and exuberance of finishing my own half-marathon.
*I registered for the half today!*
Friday evening I was texting back and forth with Emily, Tristan, and Robin. Emily and Tristan were on their way to Virginia Beach and wanted me to come with them. Robin had been in Virginia visiting family and was flying out of Richmond on Saturday. I hadn't seen Robin in about two years, since she moved to Texas. I really wanted to see her before she flew back to Texas. We met for breakfast at a pancake place by the airport on Saturday morning and got to catch up on each other's lives. It was awesome to see her again. I love how we can reconnect even when we haven't been in touch for awhile.
When I drove home after breakfast, it was about noon and I figured I still had plenty of time to drive to Virginia Beach and hang out with Tristan and Emily. Tristan was running the half marathon on Sunday, and I really wanted to be there to support her for her race. It was spontaneous, but I decided to go, packed my travel suitcase in about 10 minutes, and was on the road! That night Tristan had to carb-load for her big race, so we all went to Cheesecake Factory and got huge bowls of pasta. And cheesecake, of course. It was delicious!
On Sunday, we had to get up at 6am to get to the start line by 7am. Race day was exciting. There were thousands of people milling about, tons of port-a-pottys and food stands, and music was blaring from a loudspeaker. You could feel the excitement and nervousness in the air. It was awesome. At 7am, the elite runners took off. Twenty-three minutes later, Tristan started with her heat. It was cool to see so many people run by!
It was around this time that I decided I really want to do this. I have been toying with the idea of doing a half marathon for awhile. Several girls from my class are doing the Richmond marathon/half-marathon and they keep encouraging me to do it. I've been running consistently this summer and I've built up to about 4-5 miles so far. After being there with Tristan, and seeing the excitement and determination of everyone, I want to do it even more. I don't think 13.1 miles will be easy. But that's kind of the point. I want to be able to push through even if I'm hurting. I want to be able to run farther than I think I can. I want to have the determination and the strength to not give up. I want to experience the excitement and exuberance of finishing my own half-marathon.
*I registered for the half today!*
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