Better Off

Before I met you,
I was doing just fine

I was out having fun

My decisions were mine

I was having adventures

All my pictures are proof

Who cares if I had

Anxiety through the roof

You promised me purpose

You promised me peace

So I turned from my sin

And I tried to believe

I thought, "Things will be good now"

My motives are pure

Then came the loneliest season

I've had to endure

God, what are you doing?

Why are things getting worse?

I thought following you

Was a blessing, not curse!

The past way was easy

I was better off then!

Why is your way harder

Why don't I have friends?

God said, "You can trust me

I know this is tough

But what I offer you

Is more than enough"

There's eternity waiting

A new life ahead

Are you better off living

Or better off dead?

Live Fearlessly

For Josh, written at Joshua Tree national park

Verse 1:

You should be here, you'd light up the room
You'd be on the dance floor with your crazy moves

We'd talk about our past adventures and you'd make your niece laugh loud

As she's throwing flowers down the aisle, you'd be standing up there proud

When your little sister says, "I do"

Here and now we remember you

Chorus:

We'll never forget: you had the biggest grin

No matter the stakes, you were all in

You were diving in, you were flying high

You were racing past on a motorcycle ride

But you'd always stop to lend a hand

Cause that's the kind of friend we had

A fearless life, an intense love

That's the man we're so proud of

Verse 2:

You'd talk a lot, and knew some things

But what we remember most was the way you lived:

Love intensely, don't hold back

Offer forgiveness when you can

Dream big, and work hard

That's the only way to make it far

Live fearlessly and take some risks

From you, we remember this

Chorus

Bridge:

You know the craziest pl-a-a-a-ans make the best stories

And without some pa-a-a-a-ain, there's no glory (there's no glory)

Love intensely, don't hold back

Offer forgiveness when you can

Live fearlessly and take some risks

From you, we remember this

December 28, 1991 - June 21, 2019

Bulletproof

I need to be alive, to feel
The threat of danger at my heel
To hurtle towards a worthwhile cause
The task's the goal, not the applause

At every summit there will be

A new horizon calling me

I never stop, I must confess

My energy is limitless

I'm bulletproof, I'll have you know

So far I've knocked down every foe

Who couldn't keep a steady pace

I'll die before I'll quit the race!

Then I met you, we were a team

You made me hope, you made me dream

Of joint adventure, races run

Together, we'd have much more fun

We'd conquer all the darkest nights

Then you decided not to fight

For me, and I learned this hard truth:

I've never been that bulletproof

Books of 2016

Lockdown – Tarah Benner

The fourth book in the Fringe series. These are fast, enjoyable reads about a dystopian future where the earth has been damaged by radiation. I hope the author wraps up the series in another book or two and doesn't drag it out too long, but I'll continue to read as long as I care about Harper and Eli. I also love the supporting characters like Celdon, Sawyer, and especially the other kids from Harper's training class.

Series: 4/5

Moonlight Mile – Dennis Lehane

I picked this book up at a grocery store of all places! I didn't know anything about it, other than what it said on the cover - that Dennis Lehane was the author of Mystic River and Shutter Island (I haven't read either, but I did like the movie Shutter Island). I later learned that this is somewhat of a sequel to Gone, Baby, Gone (I saw that movie a long time ago - all I remember is that it's about a kidnapped kid). This book takes place after the kidnapped girl has grown up, and has suddenly disappeared again. The same detective investigates, and has to deal with how he handled the case the first time. It's an entertaining story, with a few twists and turns along the way. Rating: 3/5

The Husband’s Secret – Lianne Moriarty

Big Little Lies – Lianne Moriarty

I'd heard a lot about Lianne Moriarty's books and I finally read two this year! They were both fun beach books. Both books are written from multiple characters' perspectives, and the lives of the women intersect in various ways. There are a few twists and surprises that make it a fast, fun read. Rating: 3/5

The Glass Castle – Jeannette Walls

This was an interesting memoir about a girl who had a rather unconventional childhood. Her father was a dreamer and an alcoholic who couldn't hold down a job, and her mother was an artistic free spirit who hated to work. The four children grew up in an unstable environment in various dilapidated houses, often without enough to eat. This book reminded me that people can be terrible parents even if they love their kids. And some people don't want to be helped. This excerpt kind of sums up the book:

“I think that maybe sometimes people get the lives they want.”

“Are you saying homeless people want to live on the street?” Professor Fuchs asked. “Are you saying they don’t want warm beds and roofs over their heads?”

“Not exactly, I said. I was fumbling for words. “They do. But if some of them were willing to work hard and make compromises, they might not have ideal lives, but they could make ends meet.”

Professor Fuchs walked around from behind her lectern. “What do you know about the lives of the underprivileged?” she asked. She was practically trembling with agitation. “What do you know about the hardships and obstacles that the underclass faces?” Rating: 3/5

A Walk in the Woods – Bill Bryson

This was a funny tale about a writer's foray into the world of backpacking when he attempts to hike the Appalachian Trail. I've read another book by a guy who actually finished the hike. While his book was informative, he was prepared and pretty much did everything the right way. Bill made a lot more mistakes and struggled a lot more, which makes his book more humorous. He also did some research on the history of the trail and includes some interesting tidbits. However, the fact remains that he gave up his goal of hiking the entire trail rather easily (but, as he points out, many people start the hike and don't finish). Rating: 3/5

East – Edith Pattou

This book was recommended to me by a staff member at the little bookstore in Maine. It's based on an obscure old fairy tale. It started out pretty good, with a daughter born to a superstitious mother who gets a prediction that her child will perish under ice and snow. However, there is no character development!! The relationship between the girl and the polar bear is never explained or explored or really written about at all! It kind of reads like a news article, just stating the facts. The advice "show, don't tell" should've been applied here. Rating: 2/5

How Not to Travel the World – Lauren Juliff (3/5)

A Thousand New Beginnings – Kristin Addis (2/5)

I read these two books about traveling while I was traveling in Italy (lots of downtime on trains and planes). I liked Lauren's book better because she struggled to overcome her anxiety, did a lot of dumb things, and eventually learned to become a stronger, more competent person due to her adventures around the world. Kristin came across as super confident and popular, always met new people right away, and was adept at fitting into new cultures, even able to bargain for the best prices like a local. I couldn't relate to her, and her book just seemed like a list of all the places she visited. Her pictures were amazing, though!

Present Over Perfect – Shauna Niequist

I normally don't read many Christian self-help type books, but I'd seen this one pop up on the internet a few times and thought I'd give it a shot. After all, who doesn't want to learn about how to live in the present over seeking perfection? Shauna talks a lot about saying no to good opportunities and finding peace in the quiet, but never really addresses how to be present in the moment, other than to say we should sit down in the middle of the mess and realize this is actual life, rather than waiting around for fantastic. She talked about learning to appreciate stillness even though she's an extrovert. (As an introvert, I've always appreciated quiet time away from people). I thought the most poignant part was in the beginning, when Shauna realized she was living a life she hated. That was a good reminder to me to make choices with a big-picture perspective. In the end, Shauna mainly talked about slowing down and that could've been a blog post rather than a book. Rating: 2/5

The Girl on the Train – Paula Hawkins

This was a pretty good thriller/mystery. Not great, but good. I was intrigued by the idea of a woman witnessing something unusual from the train. It sounded like an Agatha Christie mystery at first. It was more of a thriller and a page-turner. I figured out who the culprit was, but I'd rather have an answer that makes sense than some random twist that doesn't make sense at all. This kept my attention and was a good distraction for my plane ride. Rating: 3/5

Audiobooks - do these count?

Winning Balance – Shawn Johnson 3/5

Wild – Cheryl Strayed 1/5

I listened to these two autobiographies on long car rides. They could not have been more different. I love gymnastics and I follow a bunch of the gymnasts from the past two Olympic teams. I really enjoyed learning about Shawn's story, especially because she didn't take the typical route of an elite gymnast. Her parents wanted her to have a normal life, so she still went to school and trained about half as much as other elite girls her age. When Shawn came on the scene at competitions, no one knew who she was at first! I also liked hearing about her experience on Dancing With the Stars - I didn't realize she competed on the show so soon after the Olympics were over!

Wild was kind of boring, and I probably would've stopped listening - except I had a 12 hour drive and it was something to do. Cheryl was pretty selfish and stupid, both in life and on her hike. The fact that her backpack was so heavy she couldn't lift it to swing it onto her back should've been the first clue to get rid of some junk. Also, shooting up heroin right before the hike probably wasn't the best idea. As for her personal life, she inexplicably left her husband even though he was seemingly the one person who was reliable and genuinely cared for her. 

Overall, I'm slightly disappointed in the books I read this year. Most were average: entertaining or interesting, but nothing captivating or ground-breaking. A few were real duds. I hope to find more 4 and 5 star books in 2017.

Books I Read: 2015

One of my goals last year was to read 12 books, a repeat of a goal I had in 2014. An average of a book a month is doable for me and not that overwhelming- but still reminds me to do some reading when I get a chance! These are the books I read in 2015:

1-3. The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden - Jessica Sorenson (series of 3 books) (also Redemption of Callie and Kayden & Resolution of Callie and Kayden)
This is a young adult series that I read on my plane flights to/from Key West in January. It's a fun love story but also deals with some issues like abuse. Overall a very quick read, but it was great for vacation and I liked the characters. (3/5)

4-6. Recon: The Fringe series - Tarah Benner (3 books so far) (also Exposure and Outbreak)
This was a young adult series about a post-apocalyptic world in which characters live in huge facilities in the desert because the rest of the outside world is uninhabitable due to radiation. It starts out kind of weird, but I ended up loving the characters and the storyline was engaging throughout all three books. (4/5)

7. Ready Player One - Ernest Cline
This was another futuristic book in which characters are involved in a huge multi-player video game that is more real than their actual lives. One of the goals in this video game is to find a prize hidden by the creator. Pretty fun book. (3/5)

8. The Kitchen House - Kathleen Grissom
This is a historical fiction novel about a young Irish immigrant girl who ends up being raised by black slaves in the "kitchen house" on a Southern plantation. I really enjoyed it, although the author was a little melodramatic at times. I liked it better than the Help, which is a similar period piece. (4/5)

9. Life After Life - Kate Atkinson
I don't even know how to rate this book. It was so unusual. Basically every time the main character Ursula dies, she comes back to life and lives through the same experiences, up to a pivotal moment when a different choice or event changes the course of her life. It was good for awhile but then I started to get irritated with Ursula making the same bad decisions in life after life. There wasn't really an ending either. (2.5/5)

10-11. Legend & Prodigy - Marie Lu
These were enjoyable books as a diversion on plane rides, but ultimately forgettable. Like, I can barely remember them enough to write a synopsis, other than that the two main characters are named Day and June. I still have yet to read the third book, Champion. I'll probably read it just to finish the series even though these books were just ok, (2/5)

12-13. The Silkworm & Career of Evil - Robert Galbraith (aka JK Rowling)
I love this new series by J.K. Rowling. The Silkworm was not quite as good as Cuckoo's Calling, but I still enjoyed it, Career of Evil was better and I liked how it explored both Cormoran and Robin's pasts a bit more. These books are very "adult" with an extensive vocabulary and mature themes. It's not a fast paced serial killer thriller like James Patterson writes, but I like these books much better. Silkworm (3/5). Career of Evil (4/5).

I read a lot of series and young adult books this year, especially ones with futuristic or post-apocalyptic themes. This coming year I hope to branch out and read a greater variety of books. I'm making the same commitment of 12 books a year!

Movies Based on Books

I recently watched a lot of movies based on books, so I thought I'd do a little review here.

Mockingjay: Part 1

This is the most popular book to movie franchise right now. I saw the movie a few months ago. I loved the Hunger Games books. I think the movies are pretty good, but certainly not as good as the books. I don't especially love the casting. Jennifer Lawrence is a good actress and I like her a lot in other movies, but she's not how I pictured Katniss. She has grown on me with each sequel though. I liked this movie, but I'm even more excited for Part 2, when we get to see more of Peeta! It's kind of annoying how movie companies keep splitting the last book in a series into two movies, but it makes a little more sense with this book because there are two distinct parts.

The Host

I saw this about a year ago, but I wanted to include it because I really liked this movie! I actually never read The Host, but it's written by Stephanie Meyer, the author of the Twilight books. I watched this movie not expecting too much, but I thought it had an intriguing premise: aliens are trying to inhabit earth by taking over human bodies as their "host". It turns out some humans are able to resist better than others. It sounds weird, but it's a really good fun story. It's kind of hard to describe, but definitely worth a watch.

Divergent

This is probably my favorite movie of the bunch. I read Divergent and liked it (although the other books in the series weren't nearly as good). The movie made the book come alive almost the way I pictured it, which rarely happens! This is one movie where I thought the casting was perfect (unlike the Twilight series and Hunger Games). I loved the casting for Tris, Four, and Eric. I also thought they did a good job with the fear landscape scenes. Maybe this book was easier to adapt because it has more action sequences and less thinking/feeling/emotions that can't be conveyed onscreen. For that reason, I thought the movie was just as good as the book. Maybe even a little better, because Four is smoking hot! (and so are his tattoos!)

The Fault in Our Stars

I never read this book, but I'd heard a lot about it. I knew it was a tear-jerker, so I decided to watch the movie instead of trying to get through a depressing book. The movie was cute, but not great. Shailene Woodley did a good job and was completely different from the character she played in Divergent. However, her love interest was embarrassingly awkward at times. Maybe he was awkward like that in the books, but it came across as really lame in the movie. If you can get past some of those totally cheesy initial lines, the love story is pretty cute, especially the fact that they bond over a favorite book. But both characters have cancer, so you know it's not going to end well. 

I kind of hate depressing endings, but this one at least had some depth to it. I cried a bunch watching the movie, so I can't even imagine how much I would've cried reading the book.

Overall, I would recommend all of these. The first three are more light-hearted and fun, and I would watch all of them again. The last one is a tragic story that I will probably only watch once. It makes you contemplate life and death and the meaning of our existence, which is sometimes more than I want to think about when I watch a movie.

Edit: Forgot to mention another recent book-to-movie: Gone Girl

My mom read the book and said she wouldn't recommend it. She said it was dark and she didn't like the ending. So I didn't read the book, but I was interested in seeing the movie to see what all the buzz was about. It was a good psychological thriller. It's a movie where you're constantly second guessing everything that happens and trying to figure out how the characters are manipulating each other. I heard that the movie's ending was different from the book, so I read the last 100 pages of the book to find out how they differed. People lied. They are a few minor details that are changed, but overall the endings are the same. The ending is kind of frustrating, but with a plot like that, you can't expect to like how the story turns out.

Book series with disappointing sequels

Ever read a good first book in a series only to discover that none of the following books measured up to the first one AT ALL? This has happened to me a lot recently, so I thought I'd make a list. For each of these you may want to read the first book, but skip the sequels. *This post contains (minimal) spoilers for all books mentioned*

Game of Thrones

This is definitely an adult book with adult content (just a disclaimer). The first book is mainly about the Starks and the events that surround them: Bran's fall, Ned's journey to King's Landing to serve as Hand of the King, Jon's initiation as a member of the Knight's Watch guarding the wall, and glimpses through the eyes of the Stark girls. We're introduced to the Lannisters, and their scheming and plotting as they play the "game of thrones". Far away, Dany is in exile, waiting for the day when she can reclaim the kingdom that should be hers to rule.

Each chapter is told from a different characters' perspective, but the story flowed very well, and each character had an interesting point of view, as well as something to contribute to the story as a whole. I was surprised that I was actually excited to hear from each character. The story was woven together seamlessly and didn't get confusing or boring despite the multiple perspectives. In the first book.

In the second and third books, Martin adds even more narrators. The most notable is Jamie Lannister. It's interesting getting into the mind of the "villain" and discovering that he may be more empathetic than you first thought. The problem is there are so. many. characters. We become familiar with Robert's brothers, Renly and Stannis, and the key players in their entourages. We get to know Varys and Littlefinger, and other members of the King's Court. We meet all of Jon's "brothers" in the Knight's Watch. Not to mention Robb's bannermen, Arya's crew, the Tyrells, the Martells, and many more minor characters. It becomes difficult to keep track of them all.

Also, in the first book, there was one main story (the Starks going to King's landing) with two side stories (Dany across the sea and Jon at the wall). In the second and third books, the characters are all over the place: the Iron islands, Winterfell, Riverrun, Harrenhal, the Twins, the Eyrie, Dragonstone, Storm's End, and various places in the woods/villages in between. I had to keep looking at the map to figure out where everyone was and why it was taking so freaking long for anyone to get anywhere!

There is just too much going on in the books: too many characters, too many places, too many narrators. Yet not enough is actually happening: there's a lot of plotting, but not enough action. In the second book, everything basically sets the stage for one big epic battle at the end of the book. In the third book, nothing really happens until the last third of the book: then there are three weddings, two dramatic murders, a lot of people die, and Dany gets an army. The ending of the third book almost makes up for all the text you have to plow through to get there, but not quite. It just takes way too long for the story to culminate in something meaningful, and a lot of insignificant things happen along the way.

I really think Game of Thrones could have been great if George R.R. Martin had a better editor who had weeded out some of the extraneous information. And maybe if he'd stop killing off all my favorite characters.

Divergent

I like dystopian novels. I'm willing to suspend reality and delve into a futuristic world created by the author. In Divergent, I liked the idea of factions and the division of people into separate parts of society based on their strengths. However, Divergent was less about the dystopian society and more about conquering fears. In a way, it was more like Harry Potter than the Hunger Games. The main character, Tris, joins a new faction, the Dauntless, which is basically a whole new way of life for her. She discovers she is special ("divergent"), makes new friends, deals with adversity, and discovers strength and courage that she didn't know she had. Plus she falls in love! The first book was a fast, fun read.

I don't know if I've ever read a series where the books go downhill so fast. In the second book, Tris leaves the Dauntless compound, and kind of travels around to the different factions, trying to figure out what the antagonist is planning. Tris, and the book, are aimless- with no clear direction driving the decision-making. It also becomes clear that the factions don't make much sense. The dauntless are the protectors, the erudite are the leaders, the abnegation are the servants, but what real purpose do amity and candor have? Being peaceful and telling the truth don't exactly qualify them for any type of position. This dystopian world just starts to seem really dumb. Add in characters needlessly dying, Tris's poor decision-making, and a character's unlikely and unbelievable betrayal, and the story just starts to fall apart.

The third book just gets even worse, if that's possible. Now Tris and a few of her friends venture outside the city. It turns out the factions only exist in Chicago (and a few other cities), and there's a "normal" world without factions outside the walls. It seems fairly easy for them to get out, which begs the question, "why has no one done this before?" But let's not question it too much. Tris and her friends get to a compound of sorts, where they learn that scientists in the real world have set up cities with factions as a genetic experiment. In the real world, there are genetically pure people and genetically damaged people. The experiments, over time, are supposed to create a genetically pure line ("divergents") with all the best genes for a perfect society. Don't think about it too much, because it makes even less sense in the book.

The third book was so stupid, I just stopped caring. I almost didn't finish it, but managed to pull through to at least find out what happens to Tris and her love interest. It basically comes down to the fact that the factions are about to go to war inside the walls of Chicago (they still don't know inside the city that they're all part of a big experiment), and the only way to stop them is by releasing a memory-erasing serum from the genetic compound. However, the serum that will save the day is guarded by a death serum, which will kill anyone who gets inside the chamber to release it. I'm getting bored just typing this. You can imagine what a struggle it was to finish this book.

*Major spoiler* To sum up the ending: one of the main characters sacrifices themselves to release the serum and save the city, but by this point, you won't care. Usually when a character dies at the end of a book, I will cry, or get mad, or be all emotional at the unfairness of it all. In this book, I can actually say I was glad that the author made me stop caring, because I had no emotions at all at the tragic ending. Except disappointment at the stupidity of the book. And relief that the series was over.

Maze Runner

This was definitely a weird book, and it took a little bit of reading to get into it. The book starts out with no real context, and you start out as confused as the main character (who's had his memory wiped, so he's quite confused). As the reader, you figure things out along with Thomas; basically he has been dumped in a place called the Glade, which is surrounded by a giant maze. The only way out is to find a way through the maze; however the maze is guarded by Grievers and the doors to the maze close each day at sunset. You don't want to be trapped inside the maze at night with the Grievers. Thomas must help the other Gladers find a way out of the Maze before it's too late.

So the first book was initially kind of confusing, but as the book goes on, you pick up more information, get more clues, and have some idea as to what's going on. The second book is so all over the place that I can't even begin to describe the plot, except to say that there's a disease called the "Flare" that they're all infected with, and for some reason they have to race across the desert to get a cure. Random things happen that don't make sense: the Gladers discover tattoos on the back of their necks, friends that Thomas trusts act strangely and tell him to stay away from them, Thomas has "memory dreams", Thomas sees words printed on a brick saying, "Thomas, you're the real leader", creatures/machines attack out of nowhere, and finally friends betray Thomas, but then it turns out through some ridiculous explanation, they didn't really betray him. Huh? By the end you still don't know what's real, what's part of the experiment, who's good, who's bad, or what the heck happened in the last hundred pages.

The second book was pretty confusing and brought up a lot more questions than it answered, but maybe this series could have been redeemed by a final book that made sense. No such luck. I never actually read the third book, but my mom and sister told me not to bother. They said the third book is just as convoluted as the second, and that there's no satisfying explanation for anything that happens. I trust them and I didn't want to waste my time on another disappointing book.

~~~~~

The sad part about all of these, is that the first books were so GOOD. I was excited to read the next book in each series. Unfortunately, I think some authors do not have a clear game plan for their stories and haven't thought them out much past the first book.

Recent Reads

Cuckoo’s Calling by Robert Galbraith

I read this book knowing that it was written by J.K. Rowling under a pseudonym. The reason she used a different name was to see if her book could be successful without the hype and expectations that would inevitably result due to her fame as author of the Harry Potter series. Although I knew Rowling was the author, my expectations weren't very high, since a crime novel is a completely different type of book than Harry Potter. I have to admit, I was interested to see how she would handle this new genre, and if this book would be anywhere near as captivating as her famous series. From the beginning, this book has a different feel. It’s definitely more adult, sprinkled with the F-word, numerous vocabulary words that I had to look up, and one very unexpected (but not explicit) sex scene.

To my surprise, I got pulled into the story right away. The story starts out with the death of a famous model, and the investigation delves into the lifestyle of the rich and famous. The investigator, Cormoran Strike, who has a prosthetic leg, a mountain of debt, and an unhealthy relationship with the beautiful Charlotte, is unlike any detective I've read about. But his methodical interrogations and steady compilation of evidence were reminiscent of my favorite Agatha Christie novels. This isn't a suspenseful, edge-of-your-seat story as much as a “thinker” but I still found that I couldn't put it down. By “thinker”, I mean that it’s not full of chases or buildings being blown up, but of evidence being collected, with several pieces that don’t seem to make sense. It’s up to the reader to try to put together all the clues; although I would be very surprised if many readers successfully identify the killer!

All in all, this was a good crime story, with plenty of twists and surprises. I enjoyed getting to know Cormoran Strike and his assistant Robin. I just found out that Rowling is releasing a second book with the same characters this summer, and I can’t wait!

Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand. This is my mom’s favorite book, and she’s been trying to get me to read it for years. I put it off, not because I didn't want to read it, but because I wanted to give it the time and attention it deserved. Obviously, I had high expectations. This book did not disappoint.

Unbroken is the true story of Louis Zamperini, an unlikely championship runner who was on a quest to break a 4-minute mile. World War II interrupted his Olympic dreams, and Louie ended up joining the Air Force, where he flew many missions as a bombardier. One fateful day, Louie’s B-24 crashed into the Pacific Ocean, and Louie had to find the courage and hope to survive in the most desperate and brutal circumstances.

I don’t want to give away too much of the story, but so much more happens! I was overwhelmed by the bravery and perseverance of the men who fought in World War II, and also saddened and angered by what they had to go through. The title says it all:  Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption. It’s amazing that this is a true story. (Side note: there is a movie based on the book that’s coming out December 2014. I’m excited but also apprehensive. There is no way a movie can do justice to the book, unless it’s about 5 hours long.)

Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson. This was an interesting book (by the way, I can’t believe I read two biographies back to back!). I didn't know much about Steve Jobs before I read this book, other than that he was the founder of Apple. I've never been an Apple enthusiast. I don’t have an iPod or an iPad or an iPhone. In fact, I've always considered Apple to be one of those trendy overpriced brands, and consequently I’ll buy the Android or Kindle versions of their products.

Steve Jobs biography gave me a different perspective, because now I know the history of Apple. Interestingly, Jobs always viewed Apple as a rebel/renegade business, going against the grain of big corporations like Microsoft, so it’s kind of ironic that Apple is a big corporation like that now. What sets Apple apart is that Jobs focused on fully integrated, user-friendly products (in other words closed systems), when other companies were making their products compatible with multiple systems.

Personally, Jobs wasn't the easiest person to get along with. He would yell at people in meetings, tell everyone their ideas were crap, steal good ideas and present them as his own, and give employees impossible deadlines. The original Apple computer was really Steve Wozniak’s invention, but it was Jobs who had the business sense to market it and sell it.

However, despite all the negatives, Jobs was a great businessman and had an intuitive sense for great products. Because his focus was so different from other companies, he revolutionized the way people listened to music, browsed the internet, and used their phones. He also took risks by making decisions without using data analysis (as so many other companies did), and completely scrapping a project and starting over when he felt that it wasn't right. He saved Apple when he returned as CEO. His marketing skills were revolutionary: just watch an iPod or iPad commercial- there’s no mention of the features of the product, but a focus on what the consumer can do with it.

I also enjoyed reading about Jobs’ involvement with his other business ventures, such as Pixar. He definitely had a knack for recognizing people with creative talent and forming a team to make something great together.  It was cool to read about a business that’s as current and relevant as Apple. Steve Jobs has left quite a legacy.

Update: These are still the best books I've read in the last year! All of these are 5 stars!

Best Buy of 2013

One of my favorite purchases last year was the Kindle Fire. I got it mainly for the purpose of having a portable tablet, but discovered that I really enjoy it for reading books and watching Netflix, too.

During a ski trip to Maine, I read The Cuckoo's Calling by J.K. Rowling (written under the pseudonym Robert Galbraith). It was a surprisingly entertaining mystery. I started the book not really expecting too much and ended up liking it a lot! I was impressed by Rowling's vocabulary. The dictionary feature of the Kindle was an unexpected benefit, because there were several words I had to look up. The Kindle was great for reading easily on the plane; it hardly took up any space, and I was able to use it to read, browse the internet, and watch Netflix at the airport.

The video is very clear and crisp for a 7 inch screen. Sometimes I like to watch a TV episode in bed before I go to sleep, and it's perfect for that. I'm starting to discover a few other uses, like using Evernote to keep to-do lists, but I haven't downloaded many apps yet. Still, even if I just use it for internet and books, I think I'll get my money's worth. I love it so far!

End of year book reviews

These are the rest of the books I read in 2012.

August: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, Across the Universe

Guernsey was a book I read for a book club. It was a perfect choice for a book club because it was a series of letters written by people who were in a kind of long-distance book club. The characters in the story were so unique and loveable. Telling a story through letters can be difficult, but it worked in this book because you got to know each characters' personality through their writing style. Rating: 4/5

Across the Universe is a sci-fi book about a girl who is cryogenically frozen and wakes up hundreds of years in the future on a spaceship bound for another planet. The book was imaginative and suspenseful, although it was a little annoying that it took about 100 pages for the girl to wake up. It had some good twists and it was interesting enough that I want to read the next book in the series. Rating: 3/5

September: The Shack, Rebecca

The Shack was interesting. It's about a man whose daughter is kidnapped and murdered, but the story's not really about that. Instead, it's more of a theological discussion about pain and suffering. The book addresses some important topics with a different perspective, including the presence of evil and how God can allow horrible things to happen to good people. But some of it was a little boring and I didn't research it to find out if it was completely Biblically sound. Rating: 2/5

I have to admit, I didn't finish Rebecca, although I plan to soon. I had to return it to the library before I was done and then I got busy with clinicals. The main character in Rebecca is a girl who can't seem to get out from Rebecca's shadow. I found her wimpy and frustrating. The book is kind of dark and slow paced and I'm not really sure if I like it all that much. However, judgment will be withheld until I finish the book.

October: none

November: none

December: Reached

Reached was the final book in the Matched trilogy. I had a lot of expectations for this book... and I was kind of disappointed. The first book in the series was so good! The second one had a bit of that second-book-lag, but it was still interesting. The main characters discovered some important questions in the second book that needed to be answered. The third book could have gone in so many different directions- with the mysterious test tubes, the Rising, and the relationships among the main characters. Instead, the final book became about the Plague that was affecting people in the Society, and a race to find the cure. It was an okay book, just not what I was expecting. I think the final book could have ended in a half dozen ways that would've been more exciting. Rating: 3/5

Overall, I read some great books in 2012! Here are some I plan to read in 2013:
-A Million Suns (the sequel to Across the Universe)
-Fade and Gone (sequels to Wake)
-Unbroken (I've been wanting to read this one for awhile and haven't yet because it's a book that needs my full attention. I've heard it's amazing and it's my mom's favorite book.)

Mid-year book reviews

Jan/Feb: Anna Karenina
Anna Karenina was an interesting book about family life and fidelity in Russian society. The storyline keeps switching among three main characters/couples. There was one couple/storyline I cared about, another one was interesting because the characters were headed for inevitable destruction, and one storyline was rather boring. There were some sections I read where I couldn't put the book down and others where I struggled to make it through each chapter. In the end it was pretty good, but not amazing. Also, you have to have a lot of time, because it's a LONG book. Towards the end, I just wanted it to be over. Rating: 3/5

March: Hunger Games series

I loved the Hunger Games series! I thought they were creative and exciting books. I read them over Spring break - good thing, because I couldn't put them down! The first two books were amazing: suspenseful, imaginative, and at times heart-wrenching. The last book fell a little flat, in my opinion. There were so many action scenes and battle sequences, it read like a movie script rather than a book. However, the last book does have a satisfactory ending, so overall the series hits the mark. Rating: 5/5

April: Little Bee

Little Bee was an intriguing book. The summary on the back cover is intentionally vague because the author doesn't want to "spoil the story". So I didn't know much before I started reading, except that it was a story about two women and how their lives intertwine after some mysterious event. Part of the fun and suspense of the book is trying to put together the pieces of the story and figure out each woman’s secrets. The story goes back and forth between each character’s point of view. I liked one girl’s narration better - she was more original and witty than the other woman - so I found myself looking forward to her chapters more. Unfortunately, the ending seemed a little contrived. Rating: 3/5

May: Wake, Once a Runner

Wake was a fun book! It’s unique and interesting: it’s a story about a girl who gets pulled into other people’s dreams. Because of her weird ability, she knows other people’s deepest secrets, fears, and desires. However, she is powerless to change the dreams, and her “gift” becomes a curse at school as she gets pulled into dreams at inopportune times. This book was a real page-turner. It’s not the best YA book ever, but it’s a fun, fast, suspenseful read. 

Rating: 4/5

I thought I would really like “Once a Runner”. I enjoy stories about athletes overcoming obstacles and working hard to meet their goals, and I like to run! I’d heard that this was “the best book ever written about running”, so I had high expectations. The book was… unusual. The author used outdated metaphors, which was confusing. He also approached each chapter from a different perspective, which sometimes hindered the flow of the story. What the author did capture was the fanatical work ethic and unwavering dedication required to become a top-notch athlete. However, at times this obsession was depressing rather than inspiring. Still, the book had many memorable quotes and the highlight of the book was the final race, which was a true masterpiece. Rating: 3/5

June: What Happened to Goodbye

I usually like Sarah Dessen books for what they are- quick easy reads, perfect beach books. This one was kind of boring though. It seemed like it took forever for anything to actually happen. The girl was just constantly going back and forth between her house and her dad's restaurant! The last third of the book was a little better as the relationship between her and the boy next door starting getting interesting, but still it was just okay. If you want to read a Sarah Dessen book, I would try “Just Listen”, “The Truth About Forever”, or “Lock and Key”. Those are my three favorites, in that order. Rating: 2/5

July: Matched, Crossed, Peach Keeper

Okay, I admit it, I bought "Matched" because it was recommended to me on Goodreads based on my interest in "The Hunger Games". The thing is, it did not disappoint! "Matched", like "The Hunger Games" is set in a future world, where a central government controls everything. Other than that, the stories play out very differently. In "Matched", the Society controls what you eat, what you wear, even who you marry. This becomes a problem when the main character, Cassia, is matched to one boy, but falls in love with another. The first book was amazing. The second book "Crossed" was very good, and I can't wait for the third book "Reached" to come out in November! Watch the Matched trailer if you want to see a fun teaser for the book. Rating: 4/5 

Peach Keeper

The "Peach Keeper" was just okay. I have a friend who loves Sarah Addison Allen's books. Laura describes her books as magical, like a dessert that's too sweet, but you eat it anyway. I was intrigued by this description, so I decided to give one of Allen's books a try. At times it was funny and cute, but it was also corny and predictable. The main problem was that the relationships in the story seemed unrealistic, although I thought a few of the supporting characters were loveable. It was kind of a cute story about friendship, but ultimately very forgettable. Rating: 2/5

All in all, I've read some great books this year! I would recommend any of the books that I rated a 3/5 or higher, so if you're looking for some new books to read, give some of the ones on this list a try. I've been meeting my goal to read at least one book per month. I hope to read many more good books in the second half of 2012!

The Hunger Games

During Spring Break, I read all three books in the Hunger Games series. I'm obsessed with them! The story of a future world in which the evil Capitol keeps all the districts under its control by sending children into an arena to fight to the death is intriguing. There's plenty of action, suspense, and bravery. But what really makes it good is the love story. When Katniss and Peeta are sent into the arena against 22 other children, Peeta is determined to protect her, to die for her, because he loves her. His love is the kind I love to read about in books- it's brave, sacrificial, unconditional love. He wants what's best for her no matter what that means for him. I love it, but it also makes me a little depressed. Because it's so unrealistic. What guy would really do that? What man would be willing to die for a girl who didn't even know him? What person would sacrifice everything for the one he loves, even if they didn't love him back?

Then it hit me. There is a love story like this. It's real, and I know because it happened to me. There is someone who loved me long before I even knew who he was. There was someone willing to die for me long before I loved him back. There was someone who wanted to protect me from a fate worse than death. He was willing to suffer, to be tortured, to be charged with crimes he didn't commit, and ultimately to die a horrible death. It didn't matter if I loved him yet or not. He loved me.

Of course I'm talking about the only person capable of that kind of love- Jesus. There are so many love stories that contain pieces of this kind of perfect love. I think that's why I love to read them- because I want a love like that. What I need to realize is that I already have it. And it isn't obtainable through anyone else but Jesus. Love stories are great because they can remind us of the greatest love story of all. Every time we read about a love that's selfless and pure and good and abundant, it should remind us of the only One who can display that kind of love. There's a reason people are riveted by anything that comes close to describing a love like that. It's what we all desperately desire, yet we can only find it in one place.

"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge" (Ephesians 3:17-19)

"The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: 'I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness'" (Jeremiah 31:3).

"This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins" (1 John 4:9-10).

This world is not all there is

This world is not all there is;

I can tell by the secrets the wind whispers

And by the delicate buds on the flower.

There is more to the story;

I know it when I see a majestic mountain

Or a tiny snowflake that seems handcrafted
Just for me to appreciate.

I know there’s a great force at work when I
Hear laughter, or see a hundred faces a day
And they’re all different, yet beautiful
Each in their own way.

I hear it in music, in birdsong, in the humming of technology,
In the crash of the waves on the shore.

I see it in art, in landscaping, in the trees, and in my fingers

And I know, there’s got to be more.

More than this earth, more than we can see

More than we can know or understand

I can’t wrap my mind around it completely,

But I know for sure: This world is not all there is.

Don’t despair; there’s something more.

Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”

Best children's and teen book series

Here are my top ten children/teen book series. I define a series as at least 4 books (3 is a trilogy, 2 is a sequel). These were my favorite series growing up.

1. Boxcar Children. This was probably the first series I ever read. I think I was in second grade when I read the first one. The books are about 4 siblings who are orphans. They start out living by themselves in an abandoned boxcar, but later get adopted by their grandfather. Throughout the series, they solve mysteries and go on several adventures.

2. Nancy Drew. What little girl doesn't like to read about Nancy Drew solving mysteries? My friends and I all loved these books, and I read all 56 books in the original series. Again, these are for a younger audience, about 2nd-6th grade.

3. Chip Hilton. This series is probably hard to find these days, but well worth the effort. This is a sports series about Chip Hilton, a high school (and later college) athlete who plays baseball, basketball, and football. Of course he is amazing at all 3 sports. The books are well-written and have good morals. Chip is the most humble, honest, self-sacrificing star athlete you'll ever read about in your life.

4. Chronicles of Narnia. I got this series in 3rd grade from a book fair at school and read all 7 books in record time. I absolutely loved the magical fantastical land of Narnia. When I re-read the books a couple years later, I understood more of the allegories and enjoyed the books anew the second time around.

5. Harry Potter. Of course, this is the series that the most people will have read, and everyone will have heard about. I enjoyed reading about the entire wizarding world. From Quidditch to the Sorting Hat, everything was creative and entertaining. It was a sad day when the 7th book came to a close!

6. Anne of Green Gables. This is a classic. I still love to re-read these books today. I love Anne's transformation from a freckly-faced impulsive child to a sophisticated woman. Anne is one of those characters that I aspire to be like. Her quick wit, spontaniety, kind heart, and stubborness make her one of my favorite characters in literature.

7. Christy Miller. I loved reading these books in middle school and high school. Christy is an average teenager trying to make the right decisions and balance everything in her life. I found these books to be far from the typical high school fare. They are insightful and inspiring, and I actually learned a lot about life when reading them.

8. Jennie McGrady. This is a fun Christian series about a teenage girl who solves mysteries. And gets in a lot of sticky situations. And has a lot of hot boyfriends. What more could you ask for?

9. Aloha Cove. This 8-book series is extremely hard to find, but I loved it. It's about a girl named Cass who moves to a small island in the Caribbean after her mom gets remarried. I loved how authentic the characters were, and how the books dealt with real-life problems like bad break-ups, fitting in, and anorexia.

10. Elsie Dinsmore. This series follows a young girl as she grows up, gets married, and has kids of her own. The first few books are my favorite. In the first book, Elsie's father comes back to her aunt's house after being away for many years. He has become a hardened man and it's difficult for him to establish a bond with his little daughter. Throughout the books, you see how the father-daughter bond develops and changes.

Time

I come easily
Long you think I’ll last
I’m stretched out like an eon

But I leave quickly
Leaving you aghast
At how night turned into dawn

No way to slow me
To get back the past
I’m the queen and you’re a pawn

Make much use of me
For I come too fast
And am all too swiftly gone

My favorite poems

I really enjoy poetry, as long as it's traditional poetry- ie, has a rhyme scheme and rhythm. Free verse poetry is not my favorite, nor do I like haikus, which seem kind of pointless. I especially like poems with a deeper meaning, symbolism, or irony. Robert Frost is probably my favorite poet, and the following are my favorite poems:

1. The Road Not Taken- Robert Frost
2. In Flander's Fields- John McCrae
3. If- Rudyard Kipling
4. Daffodils (aka: I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud)- William Wordsworth
5. Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening- Robert Frost
6. The New Colossus- Emma Lazarus (poem on the Statue of Liberty)
7. The Star Spangled Banner- Francis Scott Key (our national anthem is only the first stanza; the rest of the poem is amazing too!)
8. Sonnet 18- William Shakespeare
9. Trees- Joyce Kilmer
10. Choices For a Girl- Ramona K. Cecil

The last poem is an inspirational Christian poem that I had on a plaque hanging in my room. I would read it all the time- I loved it. Sadly, the framed poem somehow got lost when my family moved into their new house. Luckily, I had big portions of it memorized, or else I would NEVER have found it on the internet. As it was, I could only find the complete poem on one website- a blog of a girl from India- go figure! Since it's so hard to find, and since no one else has probably ever heard of it, I'll type it here on my blog.

Choices For a Girl
Your whole life is before you
A page so clean and white
All that will be written there
You must choose to write

Remember that you're special
God will always be with you
A woman doesn't follow
What "all the other girls" may do

Prayerfully consider
Every choice that you must make;
How you choose to live your life-
The husband you will take

With Christ as your example
You need never be afraid
Or have cause to be ashamed
Of the choices you have made
(Ramona K. Cecil)

Looking back

Everything seems easier in retrospect. When I think of college, I remember it being a lot easier than I know it was at the time. I look back at my childhood days, and I think of them as the best days of my life. But I know bad stuff happened, and when you're a kid, you feel like the world is coming to an end every time something bad happens. So my memories aren't reliable. I know there have been plenty of bad moments in my life, but when I look back at different time periods, I tend to remember the good stuff. It suddenly struck me that, despite grad school being tough and tiring right now, one day I might remember it fondly as the "good ole' days". I realized that I should probably try to enjoy grad school now and appreciate what I have while I have it, instead of years down the road.

I wrote a poem about the unreliability of memories and how things change from a different perspective. Don't laugh.

Reflections on the Past
Some days, in quiet reflections, I
Look back on days long past and wonder
If I was really happier then
Or did I change things in my mind’s eye
Making sunshine from days of thunder?

Because in my memories I see
Bliss and happiness and carefree days
I don’t remember tribulations
Although I’m sure in reality
They were filled with them in many ways

If I ponder long and hard, I can
Remember both the bad and the good
And I realize that life was never
Perfect, but a transient mental scan
Paints a flawless picture of girlhood

I wish I could go back and enjoy
Time with no expectations, issue,
Or worry; the past is alluring-
It’s safe, there’s nothing hidden or coy
About it; yet once, before we knew
What would come, the past was the future.