Monday, June 21, 2021

How far I’ve come

 Sometimes it’s nice to look back and reflect on my running journey. For me, I’ve never absolutely loved running- I hardly ever have a strong urge to run, and I don’t really miss it when I’m not doing it. But I do like getting outside and being active. Training for a race gives me a goal to shoot for, and that’s what keeps me motivated to run. Without a race to look forward to, I run a little bit here and there but I tend to fall off the bandwagon pretty quickly. Race weekends are so fun and make all the training runs worth it!

When I first tried to run in high school, I couldn’t even run a mile. I would get painful side stitches and I’d have to walk within half a mile. I was on the swim team in high school, so I was in decent shape, but I was terrible at running. When I was in college, I tried to run some for exercise. I did build up to 3 miles, but that was it. I always felt like I was going to die after 3 miles. Sometimes I couldn’t even make it 3 miles. I remember I used the elliptical for awhile and thought I was building up my endurance. Then I tried to actually run again, and realized the elliptical isn’t really that much like running! Lol. 

I was stuck at 3 miles for the longest time. Honestly 3 miles was the biggest mental roadblock for me. For about 5 years, it was the max I ever thought I could do. I only ran sporadically, but not fast and never more than 3 miles! It wasn’t until my first year of grad school that I really got into running. My best friend Tristan signed up for a half marathon so I started to try to get into running too. I remember Tristan came up to Maine to visit, and she had to do a 4 mile training run. I told her, “I can’t run 4 miles, but I’ll run 3 with you and just walk the rest.” 

Well Tristan and Kyle left me behind pretty fast, but I managed to slog through 3 miles. I was walking the last mile back to the house, and after walking for a minute, I felt like I had enough energy to run again. So I ran for a minute, then walked a little bit, then ran for a minute again. This was my first breakthrough! I was always so dead tired after 3 miles. The fact that I could recover within a few minutes of walking and actually have the energy to run some more was a revelation! I suddenly realized I could build up to more miles!

Then I went to Tristan’s race to support her. The atmosphere was SO fun. There was music, tons of people, and an excitement and nervous energy in the air that was contagious! Going to that race and seeing Tristan off at the starting line made me determined right then and there that I was going to do a half marathon too.

In the first few years of this blog, I wrote a lot about running. I even wrote about my boring training runs! Every new distance was a milestone (see what I did there 😉) and I almost couldn’t believe it when I was regularly running 6 miles or the first time I ran 10 miles! The Richmond half marathon in 2011 was my first race, and afterwards I remembered how I felt at every mile (and documented it).

I’ve come a long way since that first race. Now 10 years later, I’ve run over 30 half marathons and 4 marathons. This year I’m training for a half Ironman! I’ve never been a very fast runner, but my endurance has improved tremendously. In the past few years, I’ve been challenging the notion that “I can run far, but not fast”. I’ve never been a naturally good runner. It has taken years to build up stamina and speed. But this year, I’m finally seeing consistently fast paces (for me). Ten years ago, I started with 10 minute miles. Then I got to 9:30 paces for awhile, then around 9:15. For a long time, a 9:00 minute pace was my fast pace where I really felt like I was pushing myself, and a 9:15-30 pace was my comfortable pace. My lofty goal for a half marathon is usually to run a sub-2. I never really thought I could get much faster than that.

This year I’ve been getting into triathlon training, so I’m biking and swimming in addition to running. And the most surprising thing about all this cross training, is that it’s making my running faster. In the past few weekends, I’ve done a long run every Sunday, and I’ve been running almost every mile at a sub-9 minute pace. These were my last few runs:

7 miles. 8:47 pace.

8 miles. 8:34 pace.

7 miles. 8:20 pace. (Last mile @ 7:49 pace)

9 miles. 8:19 pace. (Mile 8 @ 7:55 pace) (Mile 9 @7:48 pace)

10 miles. 8:32 pace (Last mile @ 7:57)

11 miles. 8:28 pace

Today. 9 miles. 8:10 pace. Last 4 miles all sub-8 min (7:59, 7:53, 7:49, 7:33)

This isn’t to brag or to make me feel all proud of myself. It’s a reminder of how far I’ve come. There are still lots of runners who are way faster than me, and probably got to these paces a lot faster than I did. But the thing about running is that it’s a race against yourself. It’s trying to beat my best time. It’s trying to go a little faster than I have before. It’s about reaching the limits of what I thought I could do, and then saying, “I think I can go a little farther.”

When I was stuck at 3 miles running a 10+ minute pace, I never, never thought I’d be able to run 10 miles at a sub-9 minute pace. And now here I am. So even though I don’t LOVE running like some people do, even though I’m not a naturally fast or gifted runner, even though it’s taken me a long time to get here; running has taught me so much about how to overcome mental barriers, how to push past my limits, and how to persevere when things get hard. That’s why I still run. That’s why I keep running. Once one goal is met, there are always new goals to chase.


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